an accidental thank-you

My big brother got married on Saturday.

How weird is that? Actually, it's weird that it's not weird. Benton and I are not close in any way, shape or form, but I really did enjoy his wedding (seriously, though, who doesn't enjoy a party with free booze?). He and Amy looked nauseatingly happy and, personally, that kind of overzealous affection makes me vomit. I mean, if I was getting married, I totally wouldn't want my groom blowing kisses at me during the entire ceremony. That's. Too. Much. But hey, that's what they're into, so I suppose it's good they found each other.

It'll come as no surprise then that I've got love on the brain. Weddings'll do that to you.

As I rode back to Dallas with my parents yesterday afternoon, I listened (via iPod) to Keith Urban's newest CD, Defying Gravity. I'm not a huge country music fan, but I liked it. Anyway, the song Standing Right in Front of You really piqued my interest and made me smile. Now, of course I have no actual way of knowing, but it made me think of some of the things Mitch must have been thinking the entire year we casually dated, a term that's always made me laugh.

Out on the street corner, just like every morning,

I sit here and watch you walk my way

And even though I don't know you,

As you get closer,

I swear, I feel my heart start racing, aching

Maybe it's in my mind

And maybe I'm only dreaming

But I swear, you catch my eye as you walk by

Oh, why you gotta leave me so blue?

Baby, why can't you see that I'm the only one for you?

You can search the world over, but

You'll never find another so true

'Cause if you're looking for love, I'm standing right in front of you

I bet your heart, like mine, has been broken

By someone you should have never given it to

So, we put up a wall to keep from falling so hard [again]

It's so sad

'Cause there's such good love inside

And I've been hoping that I might find

Someone who feels the same way

Someone to share my life

On this beautiful ride, together we can see it through

Baby, why can't you see that I'm the only one for you?

You can search the world over, but

You'll never find another so true

And if you're looking for love,

I'm standing right in front of you

Open your heart, girl

Let me make your dreams come true

You could search the world over,

But I can take you to the moon

'Cause if you're looking for love, I'm standing right in front of you

[open your eyes]

...

They met at a party. She was completely unavailable, but he was caught up in her eyebrow ring and smile. They became friends. And then they weren't because life gets in the way. And then they were again. They accidentally spent Easter together. She wrote it off as something silly. He didn't. They went to concerts and on roadtrips, drank beers during the daytime, raised her puppy, took long naps, met each other's parents, watched fireworks, and played in the lake all summer. He brought her back to life. Sometimes they were frustrated by not being in the same place; when he was ready, she wasn't. And when she finally was, he suddenly wasn't. But they never fought, which in and of itself was what she loved the most. He came to her graduation. She moved farther away. They went to hockey games and pint night at the Flying Saucer. They went to more weddings than funerals. He gave her a card for no reason but to tell her she was beautiful.

And somewhere along the way they fell in love. Absolutely.

...

Mitchell, this has not been the easiest year and some odd months. In particular the last couple weeks have been trying, and you have, through it all, been steadfast. I love that you cry just as much as I do even though I tease you mercilessly for it. I love your beard and your blue eyes and your Finley nose. I love your laugh. I love how excited Clark gets when she sees you. I love the way you dance, in the car and anywhere else. You are the true definition of an optimist. You have the sunniest, happiest personality, and everyone who meets you falls instantly under a spell you don't even realize you're casting.

You remind me that I don't have to do it all alone and that I don't always have to be in control. You work alongside me because you want to, not because you have to. My parents and friends love you possibly even more than I do. I love that sometimes you get so excited for me to visit that you even vacuum. I love you for coaching tennis for six-year olds. I love your friends. I even love your mother. I love your desire to work hard. You are ambitious in your own right, tackling endeavour after endeavour with too much humility to ever brag. I'm proud of you for starting the club team and then your own business. I'm proud of you for paying your way through school. I'm proud of you for keeping your closet clean after you let me organize it. And, Mitch, I'm not sorry it took us a year to settle down. I love our story exactly the way it is. I love the way we've turned out and I love us.

You are all of our good and I am all of our bad, I know, but thank you for loving me all the same.